The most important

Well, it's the new year. And as usual, new resolutions. I was watching F.tv (fashion tv) and that's where reality strikes. My O's results will be out somewhere in the mid of january. What am i gonna do next? Where am i gonna go? Would i give up if my results don't reach my expectations? I mean cmon, it's about time i get serious about what i wanna do, what my future would be. You cant just sit there and let the future take control of your life. You just might as well dig up a hole and stay there till you die. I'm saying this as-a-matter-of-fact(ly).

It has come to a point that i couldnt care less about creating ties with any other opposite sex(like dating or whatever you might call it). I might or might not be in denial about the whole dating situation, but to me, all those dramas have become so overrated. BUT im not saying that im gonna die a lonely heart. Im just putting all these aside. Lets see who's able to change my perception ;) Okay that's not the only reason. Probably the main reason is simply because i dont wanna let my mum get so worried about me. Alright people, dont get so judgemental. Im doing this for my mum. We all have our sensitive side, and this is one of mine. Im doing this because i dont wanna make her get so worried about me(cause i know she always do). Im not like the typical teenager who's willing to sacrifice anything for a douchebag. Who goes against what your mum tells you what not to do. Yeah call me whatever you want, but the most important person in my life is my mum. (okay this is where i get teary eyed, pardon me.) Lets not get so deep into that alright. I mean i know the life that she've been through, and now all i wanna do is to make her happy. And just like me, my mum have big dreams too. 

Alright i know you might think i might have side tracked but frankly, i know what i wrote and i did not side track. The whole point is, starting from now, im gonna start making changes about me. My habits, my personality, my character, just about anything that will make me a better person. Im gonna kick my negative characteristics about me. It doesnt matter how long it takes as long as i know im creating a new me, a better me. Soul searching for short. It could take months or even years, but mum, i hope you'll be patient with me as you always do. And once ive found my way, im gonna take you with me.

~my mum always say, "always think of the life after death (akhirat)."

And the rest is yours to decide.